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Hydrate

Jersey Tank Top

Hydrate
Jersey Tank Top

Regular price $24.18 USD
Regular price Sale price $24.18 USD
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Greetings, Earthlings! I come from the far reaches beyond your comprehension, where the water is as rare as a tasteful outfit at the Galactic Council. I must insist, with all the authority vested in me by the Interstellar Hydration Federation, that you adhere to the most sacred of cosmic laws: to hydrate is necessary! Do not take this lightly, for dehydration is a menace that lurks in the shadows, waiting to pounce like a Nebulon space tiger on the unwary. 

It is imperative, therefore, that you clutch your water bottles as if they were the life-giving orbs of planet Aquatica. Sip, gulp, slurp, or imbibe with a straw – the method matters not. What is crucial is that you maintain your aqueous essence at optimal levels to ensure the survival of your species. Disregard this decree at your peril, for the Galactic Moisture Monitors are always watching, and they do not take kindly to dry, unruly civilizations. Hydrate or face the wrath of parched alien bureaucrats!


This must-have unisex jersey tank top fits like a well-loved favorite. High quality print makes it an ultimate statement shirt for years to come. This item has side seams to provide structural support. All bindings are the same fabric as the rest of the tank. Depending on the color, cotton, polyester, or rayon can appear.

.: 100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Extra Light fabric (3.8 oz/yd² (110 g/m²))
.: Retail fit
.: Sewn in label
.: Runs true to size

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