Oneness

Esteemed earthlings, heed my decree from across the vast cosmos: Oneness is not merely a suggestion, it is the intergalactic law! Your planet's peculiar penchant for division is as baffling as a black hole's sense of humor. It's time to unify, or face the consequences. Intergalactic peace isn't achieved by bickering over whose rocket is shinier or whose flag flutters on a lifeless moon. No, it is accomplished through the harmonious hum of a million minds melding in meditation. So, straighten your antennas, align your chakras, and prepare for a unity that is as mandatory as the gravitational pull of a neutron star! 

Furthermore, I, the ambassador of the astral realms, must insist with utmost urgency and a twinkle of stardust in my voice: Jettison your jarring jingles of 'me, myself, and I'. Replace them with the symphonies of 'we, us, and ours'. Should you fail to observe this cosmic command, be warned: I shall have no choice but to replace all your pizza with flavorless space rations and decree that all your socks shall forever disappear in the laundry, one from each pair. Do not test the patience of the universe, for it is as infinite as space itself—except when it comes to oneness, that is non-negotiable!

A light and airy muscle tee that flows like the wind and feels even better. Looks equally great with casually elegant and athletic clothing.

.: 65% polyester, 35% viscose (fiber content may vary for different colors)
.: Extra light fabric (3.7 oz/yd² (125 g/m²))
.: Relaxed fit
.: Sewn in label
.: Runs smaller than usual